Lily Adams and this…puppet are hanging out on the bed. She introduces herself as Lily, and we get this gem from the director:
The director (whose name is Shooter) explains they picked her up off the street, because porn is obsessed with that, and the puppet cuts in to asks if he can touch Lily’s breasts and she says ok. And, again, while weird to see in a puppet porn movie: remember kids, consent is important.
Lily asks the puppet what his name is, and he explains that his name is SPA, which stands for Sir Pops-Alot. There’s some boring dialogue, Lily exposes a breast, the puppet pretends to orgasm immediately. I feel this should be a sequence in Jizz In My Pants.
The puppet mouths on her boobs while saying “Mama” several times, which…I’m not a fan of. Lily is, though:
Lily has a Southern accent, despite being born in Cleveland.
Shooter the director is apparently also a puppet, because his hand extends into frame occasionally. Shooter asks if she’s “about that puppet life”.
As it turns out, it was Shooter she matched with on Tinder, but Lily never messaged him back. Tale as old as time / streaming now on Prime / Beauty and the Puppet.
Lily takes her shorts off and shakes her tushy in Sir Pops-Alot’s face, and the expected happens. Shooter gets in there and smacks her ass (after requesting permission). I fucking hate gonzo porn.
They want Lily to suck Sir Pops-Alot’s dick, because it’s his 35th birthday (technically, birthday week, which should disqualify him from getting head from strangers, but porn logic). She pulls his dick out – which is a dildo – and is horrified because it’s not colored orange. SPA explains he has a human dick. Shooter expands that “back in the 80s” SPA’s mother, a Muppet, hooked up with a human man, therefor SPA is mixed-race Muppet and human. I suspect the Muppets regret accepting this endorsement.
Lily gives the dildo a blowjob, there’s some inane dialogue not worth mentioning, eventually she tells SPA that he can’t come inside of her because she doesn’t want any puppet babies. Despite this very reasonable request, they still don’t use a condom. PULL AND PRAY IS A BAD IDEA, PEOPLE AND PUPPETS!
They fuck.
There’s a few shots where you can clearly see the puppeteer’s hand. I really hope they hired an actual professional puppeteer for this and he’s just hiding behind the bedframe muttering curses under his breath.
Eventually, there’s a very fake cumshot. Fun fact: unless you actually see the semen exiting the actor’s urethra, it’s fake cum. And even you do (or think you do) it still might be fake. Whether it’s Cetaphil, methyl cellulose, or a homebrew of water, cornstarch, egg whites, and sour cream, fake cum is everywhere. Also real cum. Don’t take a black light into your motel room.
This scene was shit, but I have to admit, I’m very impressed with Lily Adams here. Grading on a porn scale, as we normally do, but I still walked away fairly convinced that she wanted to fuck that puppet. Then again, given the percentage of male talent who are hideous fucking chuds, a puppet and a dildo is probably a walk in the park. What a pro.