We open on your standard-issue porn classroom with one teacher and one student: Van Damage behind the teacher’s desk, and Gia Paloma as the student. 

Van: “Gia, are you ready for your test? Put all your stuff away, get out the test, this is a timed exam. This is a make-up test, and this counts towards your final grade. You got forty-two minutes beginning…now.”

Weird length of time for a test. 

Then we…start getting text on the screen for some reason. 

Holy fucking shit! She stuffed her answers in her prison wallet! She’s a fucking cheating note mule!

Gia takes the notes out and cheats on her test. Everything is going swimmingly until a bunch of the little slips of paper fall out to the floor. Gia tries to surreptitiously kick them away, but Professor Damage notices something is off and approaches. 

Van: “Gia. You wouldn’t happen to know where these little things came from, would you?”
Gia: “They’re not mine!”

That excuse works a lot better when you’re not the only student in the classroom and the papers are right next to your desk.

Van: “Of course not.”
Gia: “Look at me, I don’t have any pockets. I’m hardly wearing anything. It couldn’t have come from me.”

That is fair; Gia is wearing so little clothing she’d probably get kicked out of a strip club. However, Van either notices something off about the paper, or just arbitrarily decides to do a sniff-test:

Van: “You must think I was born yesterday, little Gia!”

He marches her up to his teacher’s desk, has her bend over, and starts a strip-search then and there, which probably violates at least a couple rules of professional conduct, but the search takes about a single second before he discovers that her entire thong underwear is stuffed full of bits of paper. So she stuffed some inside her underwear, and some inside her vagina itself. Fascinating. 

Van: “What is this?”
Gia: “Oh fuck. I swear it’s not mine!”

Yeah, that’s going to work. 

He starts doing a cavity search to see if there’s anything left, which abruptly transitions to cunnilingus. They fuck in a variety of positions and things end the way they normally do.

After, Van tells her that she won’t pass the class ‘that easily’ and he expects her every day at 8:00. Gia seems a little peeved, but gets over it quickly, and says she’ll bring him an apple tomorrow. Who knows where that’ll be stuffed?

Kissing: Yes

Oral Sex Reciprocity Scale:

• Fellatio: 4:45
• Cunnilingus: 0:27