This one comes to us from “My Wife Caught Me Assfucking Her Mother 8”, which, spoiler alert, and also, didn’t we say everything we needed to say in volumes one through seven? It has the sort of generic, incest-adjacent plot that I like to avoid here at StupidPornPlots, but there is one scene that pays off in a big way.
We open on Alina West and Bradley Remington wandering outside of a nice-looking house. Bradley mentions how nice Alina’s mom is, and how nice the house is.
Alina: “Yeah, it wasn’t great. My mom can be a bit…overzealous…at times.”
Bradley: “Yeah, she seems really sweet, and friendly and nice.”
Alina: “Yeah, friendly is one word for it. She can be really ‘friendly’.”
They discuss why they didn’t have the reception there and why they just eloped. Solid questions, but also, why didn’t you discuss this…before the elopement? Eventually Alina suggests she’ll show Bradley the playhouse she grew up in.
We cut forward, Bradley is chilling out reading an architecture magazine inside the house, and Dalny Marga wanders in. Dalny greets him warmly and laments that her daughter never comes to visit her. Bradley’s eyes are extremely red. Either he was on the receiving end of a bukkake or he’s been hitting the pot a little too hard. My money’s on both.
Dalny: “I’d like to welcome you to the family, Bradley. Would you like a blowjob?”
Holy shit!
Bradley: “A…what?”
Dalny: “A blow-job, Bradley. I’d love to suck your dick. My daughter’s out for the day, isn’t she?”
Bradley: “Well, she went shopping with some old friends, so…is she going to be okay with this?”
Dalny: “Bradley, I’m her mother. You don’t think I know what’s okay for my daughter?”
She’s making some compelling points.
Dalny immediately starts unbuckling his belt. Bradley puts up about as much of a fight as Russian conscripts are currently doing in Ukraine. There’s some fairly standard knob-slobbing which progresses in accordance with prophecy until the camera operator says “Whenever you want to climb on, Dalny”, which, way to break the immersion there. You know you don’t have to leave that in? You can edit that out, using editing software? Or, mind-blower here, maybe work out some hand signals to tell the actors to switch to the fucking?
They fuck for a bit, she tells him to stick it in her ass, he obliges, things progress, and suddenly I notice that Bradley Remington…has a fake bullet on a chain around his neck.
That’s fucking fantastic.
Everything is going great, with even a small dog yapping in the background, until the door opens and Alina West and the legendary Evan Stone walk in the door. Shockingly, Alina is…not pleased:
Alina: “Mom, check out what Evan from high school OH MY FUCKING GOD. WHAT THE FUCK IS – oh Jesus…I’ll wait.”
Dalny: “Oh dear, you’re overreacting.”
Alina: “OVER-FUCKING-REACTING, HE’S IN YOUR ASSHOLE, I CAN SEE IT, THAT’S NOT EVEN VAGINAL PENETRATION, THAT IS ANAL RIGHT NOW. I’m standing here, it’s been twenty seconds, you’re STILL getting ass-fucked!”
I’m with Alina here, when your spouse walks in and catches you cheating on them with your mother-in-law, and they are clearly not okay with it (despite what Dalny said earlier) it’s generally considered polite to pull out…or, at minimum, stop actively thrusting. Dalny and Bradley at least look a little taken aback, but they don’t stop while Alina rants.
Alina: “I can’t even fucking believe it! This is the type of respect I get from you my entire life, and you in the past three months! I can’t deal with this! WHY WON’T YOU STOP? It’s like this is just my life, like these are the things I need to get used to? Like, my husband is ass-fucking my mother right in front of me?”
Evan Stone, scene-stealing minx that he is, surreptitiously pulls out his cell phone and snaps a quick pic without disturbing Alina’s hopefully award-winning monologue:
Alina: “I just can’t even – it’s disgusting! I’m having a panic attack! I’m fucking panicking right now. On a scale of one to even, I just can’t. Where the fuck are my antidepressants?! Where is my purse? STILL FUCKING! It’s just…there’s no stopping it. And this is the fucking life that I have…with you. I thought that things would be so much better if we just got married without her being involved…AND THERE IS STILL PENETRATION HAPPENING TWO FEET AWAY FROM ME.”
Alina wanders over to Evan and says she probably left her pills in the car. Evan says they should probably leave and helps her out the front door.
Alina: (sobbing) “It’s disgusting!”
Evan: “Come on, don’t even look at them. Go, go.”
They exit, and through the door we catch a brief glimpse of Alina smiling, so my headcanon is that she and Evan Stone moved away from her homewrecking bitch of a mom and started a life of sexual debauchery that would make Caligula blush. Bradley and Dalny finish fucking and things end the way they normally do.
Overall? Not bad. Sometimes, it’s the little things that take a generic, boring porn plot and elevate it to pure art. Dalny repeating ‘A blowjob’ like Bradley’s a little slow, the brilliance of Evan snapping a photo behind Alina’s enraged and fully justified screeching, and Bradley refusing to even slow down his strokes during Alina’s rant.
In my experience, it’s rare that a non-sex role completely steals the show, but Alina West fucking crushed it. What a pro.
Kissing: No.
Oral Sex Reciprocity Scale:
- Fellatio: 5:48
- Cunnilingus: 0:00