We open on Krissy Lynn (repeat offender) inside a prison cell, pulling on the bars, pacing, crying and shouting things like “Somebody let me out of here!” Krissy, sweetheart, if that worked, nobody would be in prison.
After a minute or so Sean Michaels enters in a decent-enough suit and suspenders and gives her a once-over.
He explains he’s a Special Tax Agent, with the IRS, and this, of course, is why she’s here.
Sean: “Let’s be specific, you’re here because of tax evasion.”
Krissy: “But I never thought that was a serious crime! I didn’t think someone could go to jail for this!”
Don’t fuck with the IRS, because they will fuck you right back, and with a giant black dick, what’s more. That’s how they got Capone.
Sean explains that he’s here to possibly negotiate a deal with her. They very, very poorly improvise for a bit. Long story short, he wants details, Krissy says she’ll tell him anything, and even sign a sworn statement to that effect. Sean says since she already lied, she’ll need to convince him she’s telling the truth. If you know what I mean. He leans up against the bars, all kinda casual, and she clutches at his jacket.
Sean: “Your hand should be much lower.”
Krissy starts giving him an over-the pants handy.
Sean: “I see that you understand me.”
Krissy extracts Sean’s sizeable member from his pants and starts giving him a good old-fashioned reacharound:
Sadly, not super common in porn.
Krissy: “It’s so big.”
Sean: “No bigger than your debt to the govern – to the U.S. government.”
Man, they suck at improvising.
Krissy gives him an unenthusiastic handjob. Eventually he pulls out a set of keys and implies that if she gives him a blowjob he’ll let her out. She sucks dick for a bit, and eventually Sean unlocks the cage but advises that he’s only letting her out to “continue their negotiations”. Krissy does a bit of a sexy striptease as she undresses, and finally Sean folds the couch with a sheet over it that’s conveniently located right outside their cell down into a bed, because it’s a futon! How handy is that!
They fuck for a bit, then switch to butt stuff:
Sean: “How does it feel to have the IRS up your ass?”
Krissy: “Well, I’ve always had them on my ass, but never up my ass. Feels pretty good!”
In fairness, that’s a pretty good line.
Later:
Sean: “Oh, you like that IRS cock, baby?”
That…may be a brand new sentence.
That’s about it. They fuck in a variety of positions. Sean drops a few more quips like saying “Pay your taxes” while he butt-fucks her until things end the way they normally do, with Sean giving out the guttural scream that sounds midway between him being surprise anal penetrated and the mating call of a bull moose.
Krissy: “So…can I get out of here now.”
Sean: “Well…I’ll have to think about that a little more.”
Krissy: “You’re kidding, right?”
Sean: “No. I’ll be back.”
Ah, yes, that old staple of blackmail porn where they immediately renege on the deal following climax. Stay classy, porn!
Overall, the plot really didn’t make any sense. He wanted a signed confession, Krissy wanted her freedom, neither of them got what they wanted legally, even if both of them seemed to have been pleasured sexually.
Kissing: No.
Oral Sex Reciprocity Scale:
- Fellatio: 3:36
- Cunnilingus: 0:00
Much like Catholic priests, IRS agents are very selfish in bed.